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“Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like

& celebrating it for everything that it is!”

We are living in a materialistic world where we feel having the wealth, career, nice property, all luxurious items will make us feel good and happy. People are not happy when they don’t have these things in life. But those who have are also not happy! Why so? What are the reasons? We tried finding out some core reasons why people are not happy.

Relying on someone else

Happiness is within us. We cannot blame others for us not being happy. If a person walks out of your life, your life becomes gloomy and nothing seems to be interesting to you. Till the time that person was there in your life, you were happy, now you aren’t which means your happiness is derived by another person and not by you or its not within you.

Comparison

Women often compare themselves with other women. “My friend owns a bag from Michael Kors and I have a bag from Baggit.” “I have got a Hero Passion and my friend has a Bullet or a Kawasaki Ninja” Do you find yourself in this situation? If so then you won’t ever be happy. Comparisons make you inferior and depressed.

No Gratitude

We fail to thank for what we have and keep cribbing on what we don’t have. We focus on what is missing in our lives than what we actually have to cherish. Anything in physical form is short-lived. Today if you have Michael Kors, you may wish for Chanel tomorrow, so our wishes are endless. We do not mean to say you should not aim high to achieve whatever you want in life, but first, one should thank for whatever he/she has in life and secondly work on to achieve what is missing.

Being in the comfort zone

“A comfort zone is a really beautiful place, but nothing grows there. When growth is missing people are unhappy. Just to be on the safer side you may work in a government job, but are you really happy? Is that your dream?

Unhealthy Lifestyle

The sedentary lifestyle has made us so lethargic that we eat all unhealthy stuff, do not exercise and depend on people and machines for our work. When we keep our body busy by working out, doing the daily chores, eating healthy, endorphins are released in the brain which is really important to be happy.

Dwell in past or future

We tend to go to the past or in the future. We forget to live in the present. The bad past and unknown future plague us so much so that we forget we are living today. Make a conscious effort to make the best in your present on all fronts as the past cannot be erased and the future cannot be seen beforehand.

Very little is needed to make a Happy Life;

it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.

To know more about Mentriq, click here

All images by Pixabay

Depression is a feeling of hopelessness and chronic sadness which is persistent for more than 3 months. The symptoms of chronic depression are losing interest in normal activities, feeling low all the time, lack of sleep or sleeping too much. These feelings may last for years intruding on your work, relationships, and daily activities. People with chronic depression don’t know what Happiness is or the circumstances and the inner feelings they have, have made them forget what Happiness is…

Is there a cure for chronic Depression?

Yes, with proper treatment chronic depression can be treated. The severity of the depression decides whether one needs to take the medicines or not. But along with medicines, talk therapy is a must. Without talk therapy, perhaps there won’t be any change in the emotional and behavioral symptoms. Medicines will help in balancing the chemical issues in the brain.

What can you do to get out of Depression?

Balanced diet: Healthy diet with vegetables, the proper amount of protein, milk products, dry fruits need to be consumed. When you eat right and less of junk your mood levels get automatically right. In case you are binging or overeating, reduce the amount of food you eat.

Exercise: Any form of exercise helps to release good hormones, makes you feel good.  You may not have that motivation which is needed. Even if you have, you may not still feel like doing so. Make a conscious effort to exercise at a certain hour and at a stipulated time.

Sleep: If you are having an erratic sleep schedule, try to keep your sleep schedules normal. Sleep only during night hours and ensure you sleep at a certain time daily.

Routine: As stated earlier, set up a routine for yourself. Get yourself engaged in activities you love. Even when you don’t feel like waking up from your bed, stick to the timetable you have set.

Set up your goals: When you set goals to give it a deadline and work to achieve your deadline. This will ensure you are out of the gloomy thoughts. When you have an aim to achieve and a will to get over depression one would try to overcome the weird feeling.

Get enough sunlight: Go and grab a daily source of vitamin K at around 9.30 am. Try to keep your rooms well lit. Do not sit in darkness.

Smile: Be around people who make you smile and have the potential to deal with your chronic sadness and help you to come out of it. Laughter and smile come from within. There should not be an effort while doing so.

Work on the core issues: If you have been through a traumatic past that is still bothering you and that issue is the reason for depression, address the issue by taking the help of your friends, family, and counselor.

Work on negative thoughts: If you have gone through a bad phase/event and you are having negative thoughts or repetitive images of the same event, you need to take the help of a counselor to challenge the negative thoughts.

Never hesitate to take the help of a psychologist to overcome depression. Let your psychologist analyze the severity of depression. You can get over chronic depression with or without medication however talk therapy is necessary.

To know more about Mentriq, click here.

All images by Pixabay.

“If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them,

And half as much money!”

As the saying goes by, we need to spend more time with our children by playing, reading together, doing an activity, learning new stuff than spending money on them by giving them all the luxuries of life. A family that stay-cates together, bonds well together.

Planning a trip during the summer or winter vacation could be beneficial to everyone in the family in so many ways…

Emotional strong bonding:

When a family or friends travel together for a holiday, they spend quality time together and enjoy each other’s company. It’s a wonderful opportunity to spend time from the daily chores, forget about responsibilities for a while, be stress-free and enjoy to the fullest. This helps to create a strong bond between family and friends.

Good academic performance:

Families who share great bonding, indirectly are taking care of their children’s academic performance. Children are open to their parents, can be frank about their academics, worry less or are less scared of them.

Less behavioral issues:

When there is a good rapport between parents and children, naturally children behave good, are less cranky, have required confidence, self-respect and esteem.

Good for overall health:

When the home temperament is good, it shows on the physical and mental health. If the bonding is not so good, children may remain unhappy, may have anger issues, dissatisfied with themselves and this would negatively impact their physical and mental health.

New learnings:

Bonding with parents and friends can be of great learning. It helps children to learn new things and get educated about new games, fishing, boating-kayaking, pottery, many indoor and outdoor games. With friends, it can be educational by learning about what team management is, learn positive qualities of friends, engage in a new activity like paragliding or scuba diving.

Communication:

Communication is the heart of any relationship. Effective communication is an important part of a strong and healthy family. When we communicate effectively, it helps to bond effectively. Children become good communicators, better listeners and most importantly a good human when the home environment is better. Hence good communication via family bonding is necessary.

Sharing:

Sharing helps to create quality moments. In India, we have so many traditions and occasions where we tend to share food, emotions, culture, traditions with each other. At holiday’s friends can share past experiences of childhood or current joys and sorrows. Children can learn the quality of sharing their food, laughter, joys and sorrows.

Memories:

We often go back to the past to relive old beautiful memories and say “Oh, what were those days?!” Family bonding, travels, get together helps to create wonderful memories for a lifetime.

To learn more about Team Mentriq, please click here

All images are courtesy Pixabay

Exam time is stressful for students as well as parents. There are two types of students one, who can be easy-breezy, do their revision and appear their exam while the other set of students, fear exam, take a lot of stress, fall ill just before exams.

Let us understand the Psychological Reaction to Stress

• Constant pressure
• Frustration and anger
• Tension
• Unable to concentrate.
• Psychosomatic symptoms like sweating-sweaty palms, headaches, stomach-aches, racing heart, nail-biting, teeth grinding, racing thoughts.

Why do people experience exam stress?

• Fear of failing
• Fear of getting fewer marks
• When not prepared fully
• Want to do really well
• Unable to grasp.
• Don’t have much time to study
• Need to get a certain result
• Parents and societal expectations
• Don’t understand what they are studying.
• Family pressure
• Competition
• Have other issues happening in their life

How can parents help their children before and while their exams are on-going?

1. Keep realistic expectations and don’t push them too hard
2. Be positive
3. Keep motivating your children no matter what.
4. Help the child in boosting his confidence especially when he/she seems discouraged. Do not displace your anxiety on the child.
5. Try to gain your child’s confidence and discuss his problems with him, help him to find a solution
6. Understand that just good schooling and tuition are not substitutes for emotional cushioning.
7. Do bring family conflicts in between studies of the children.
8. Encourage good sleep patterns and eating habits
9. Provide a comfortable space for them to study and prepare
10. Teach them the importance of study breaks
11. Encourage them to ask the teacher/parents questions if they’re unsure
12. Do not remind them of previous failures.
13. Be light and humorous with the child. Crack jokes to make the exam mood light.
14. Help them know what to expect on the day of the exam
15. Help them be on time for the exam or arrive early
16. After the exam, listen to their concerns and avoid criticizing them.
17. Let them know exams are not the end of the world.

We wish all the students “Best Luck”!!

To know about Mentriq, click here

All images by Pixabay.

Exam stress affects most students in varying ways. The stress level in school and college students is so high that they get a lot of physical symptoms due to stress.

Teachers and parents need to teach their children how to manage stress and find ways to manage it. Some students can take exams with ease but for many, it’s a task.

Here are some tips to eliminate or reduce your stress. It’s never too late to set up good study habits. Here are some helpful ideas:

Clear your room and table/desk:

Does your mother remind you to clean your room and study table? It’s scientifically correct. The more clutter you have around your room, the less you’re able to concentrate. Physical clutter overloads your brain and impairs your ability to think, which leads to stress.

Take enough breaks:

Research says it’s good to have a 17-minute break every 52 mins. A psychologist also agrees on this fact. Resting is important so that you remember what you have read. In this time period, you can read a newspaper/book/blog or do whatever you feel like doing to relax.

Time table:

Set up a time table and try to stick to it. But also remember that not to be hard on yourself if one or two items are missed. Right from waking up in the morning to sleeping in the night, get all your activities – like studying, reading a book, listening to music, watching some comedy show, lunch-dinner, exercise-playing and sleep schedule needs to be mentioned in the time-table.

Exercise:

A 15-20 min exercise like a walk, basic stretches, deep breathing exercises will help to soothe your mind. Meditation helps to relax the anxiety.

Diet:

Have a healthy diet, no junk food should be consumed and stay away from caffeine as much as possible. Stay hydrated. Have dark chocolate or hot chocolate while studying. Research has shown that an intake of a small amount of dark chocolate reduces stress hormone levels.

Concentrate on progress and not on perfection:

Do you think that you’ll never be able to achieve the goals you’ve set for yourself? Do you feel you are good for nothing? If so, you may be a perfectionist. Being a perfectionist will give you stress. Set realistic goals instead of trying to achieve the impossible.

Know your learning style:

Are you a Visual/Audio/Kinaesthetic Learner? Know your best learning style and study. If you are a Visual learner, read and write your answers on a paper or in the book or on the black-white board; if an audio learner, read them as many times you want to so that grasping becomes easy and if you are a kinaesthetic learner, walk while you read/study. This will help you to remember what you study. We all have one particular learning style and if we use it while studying, it will benefit you.

Convert the negative thoughts into a positive one:

For every negative thought find a positive thought. Ex: I haven’t studied 2 chapters yet; I know I will get questions from those two chapters only. I know I have not studied but I will go through it and try to remember as much I can.

Avoid comparison:

Never compare with other students the amount of study you have revised. There could be chances that are you’re doing just fine, but after listening to other people talk about what they’ve learned, it will only stress you out and may make you feel like you aren’t progressing as well as them. Plus, if they themselves are stressed this can affect you and other people’s stress is not what you need right now. Don’t discuss the answers post-exam as well.

Create an environment:

Instrumental music, deep concentration music is available online, light up your room, burn aroma agarbatti/essential oils to have a nice environment to study.

Hope this will help you to study and concentrate better. Team Mentriq wishes you All the best!!!!

To know more about Team Mentriq, click here

All images by Pixabay.

Happiness is a choice and it’s a journey. Some people remain happy in hard times and there are these people who cannot be happy even when there is nothing to cry for.

So we have tried listing 10 roadblocks of happiness.

Having Unrealistic sense of Self

Do you feel you are not good at anything? Do you feel you “should” have done this or do you feel that others “should” have done that? Keeping unrealistic expectations from self and others will ruin your happiness.

Entitlement

A sense of entitlement — a feeling that you have a right to something — is the root cause of most people’s unhappiness. Parents are unhappy when they don’t get the respect from their kids that they think they’re entitled to. Employees feel unhappy when they don’t get the raise they feel entitled to.

Anger

Being happy, when angry is highly impossible. We get angry when things don’t turn up the way we want or we are hurt. If these things are happening in your daily life then you need to work on them & self to eliminate anger.

Resentment

When we keep our negative thoughts/anger to ourself we get a feeling of resentment. Resentful people look at life through darkened glasses, expecting the worst and being on the ready to defend themselves from harm.

Greed

Greed is all about competition & undeserving, but happiness comes more from cooperation & what you deserve — an effort to act in harmony with the world around you. Happiness is being happy with what you have. It’s also about thriving to achieve it with own efforts.

Aggression

Aggression means “moving against the world.” Two types of aggressive behavior occur between human beings — achievement-driven aggression and combative aggression. Achievement-driven aggression can lead to happiness, but combative aggression does not.

Depression

Feelings of lethargy, low appetite, negative self-image, unable to do regular chores, lack of pleasure, guilt can never make us happy. One needs to work on these persistent symptoms to be happy.

Loneliness

You can be lonely in the midst of a large gathering of people, and not feel lonely when you’re by yourself. Happiness is more about belonging than about having money, power, and success.

Vindictiveness

Hurting a person because they were hurt is vindictiveness. Vindictive people think that by hurting the person who caused them pain — whether physical or emotional — they’ll somehow feel better. But the painful memory stays with you always making you unhappy.

Addiction

Any addiction be it drug, alcohol, food is going to give temporary happiness. Address all your emotional traumas and baggage to overcome addiction and lead a happy life.

If you are suffering through these issues and are unhappy, consult a Psychologist soon.

All images are courtesy Pixabay

To learn more about Mentriq click here

Do you run away from social gatherings? Do you fear what people will say about whatever you say or feel? Do you get tremors when you are around a bunch of people? Does your voice get choked when you have to address something or introduce yourself? Are you conscious about yourself the way you dress, look, speak in public? All these are signs of Social Anxiety.

“Social anxiety is nothing but fear of meeting strangers, negative evaluation by others which leads to a sense of inadequacy, inferiority, embarrassment, self-consciousness, humiliation which later leads to depression.” It’s a mental health disorder / social phobia which is curable without taking any medicines.

These people want to be accepted by others, they also want people to talk to them upfront. Even after other people talk to them, their self-confidence is so low that they are conscious of what they are talking about and most of the time they want to talk but cannot or forget what they have to! People with social anxiety feel comfortable when they are alone in their comfort zone, preferably at home. As they don’t want others to know what they feel or are afraid of.

How to deal with this issue?

People with Social anxiety lack Self-esteem, self-confidence, self-awareness. The following are some tips to get over the fear of judgement.

Accept that people will judge.

People will judge you no matter what. If this acceptance is there then there is nothing to worry about. As people will judge you at this moment and forget it later.

Work on your Self Esteem.

• Ask yourself what do I exactly fear?
• What will the result be if I speak out?
• Once the fear is identified, work on that fear.
• Let your near and dear ones know about it so they can help you.
• If the above doesn’t work take help from a Counsellor or Psychologist.

Take the judgement as a learning

If the judgement matters, you may take efforts to make a shift in yourself. People often fear being judged as they lack on few qualities. But if they overcome their fears, social anxiety will be gone forever.

Take help from a Psychologist

A psychologist will help you to identify the root cause of this anxiety and help to remove it completely. They help you in thinking, behaving, and reacting to situations that help you feel less anxious and fearful. It can also help you learn and practice social skills.

To know more about Mentriq, click here

All images by Pixabay

Stress negatively affects students’ performance, ability to focus and confidence. As per research, children aging 3 years of age are also getting stressed. With the competition around, parental pressure and constant comparison with other children makes students more stressed. It becomes difficult to concentrate on studies and fear takes overconfidence.

So how to get over stress?

Take a break

Take out some time to relax. Go through a book, listen to music for a while, watch some de-stressing videos. Do what you like and what will help you in de-stressing.

Breathing Exercises

 Stress gives anxiety about exams, whether the portion will be completed or not, whether you will remember the answers or not. Do some breathing exercises to calm the restless mind. Take deep and long breaths and exhale deeply too.

Stick to your time table

If you haven’t made a time table, then make one and stick to your time table. This will help you to study religiously during study hours and indulge in other activities like playing, having fun, watching TV, etc.

Exercise

Do some basic stretching or whatever suits you. This helps in relaxing your muscles and most importantly diversifies your attention and soothes your mind.

Limit Caffeine and junk food

Caffeine helps to stay awake but also increases levels of cortisol which is a stress hormone increasing stress. Junk food makes you sluggish and feels gloomy. Stay hydrated with healthy drinks like Lemon sharbat or buttermilk or lassi.

Find out the triggers

You may suffer from headaches, backaches, stomach aches which are physical indications of stress. However, try to find out what is your emotional state before any particular event or exam. Any peculiar subject which you are scared of or do not like it. Once you understand you can take steps to decrease or destress.

Make a study plan

If you don’t have a liking towards Maths or Economics, then you need to be consistent in studying the subject. Ensure you practice the same for an hour daily. Plan on when you need to finish the portion and stick to that goal.

Time management

As stated before, stick to your schedule, if you have allotted half an hour for a break then do not extend it. Also if you have allotted three hours to study then stick to those three hours so that you won’t get stressed.

Learn to be assertive

If you are occupied with work given by your family and is affecting your study time or friends request you to stay back for some time to enjoy, be assertive as it would hamper your quality study time leading to stress.

Approach a Psychologist

Stress is harmful if not addressed correctly. One might feel stress is normal especially for college students but that doesn’t mean you need to manage it on our own. If you have the physical manifestations and if it’s affecting your studies, consult a counselor or psychologist.

To know more about Mentriq, click here

All images by, Pixabay

Are you planning a new resolution? Have you tried this before and successfully failed?! Are you planning to lose weight, get de addicted, have good health – physical and mental, manage finances, be more organized? Planning a resolution is easy, but sticking to them is difficult. Generally, we can stick to the resolutions for some months, but after some months we tend to lose track.

Here are some easy ways to plan a New Year resolution and stick to them.

Plan for one or two resolutions at a time.

We tend to have too much on our plate and it becomes difficult to achieve even one goal. Take one step at a time. Plan for one or max two goals a year.

Be specific

Your goals need to be specific. “I need to lose 20 kgs by Dec 2020. For achieving this result, what are the steps you need to take? Chart them out. Join the Gym or attend Yoga class, consult a nutritionist.

Let your friends and family know

When you publicize your goals people may help you in achieving them. For eg: you are addicted to smoking & when your friends and office colleagues know they may not offer you a cigarette or force you to have one. If you know that it’s difficult to resist, stay away from that place or refrain from going to places where you might tempt.

Anticipate challenges

There could be so many challenges like having no time, busy at work, being on vacation. The idea is to find out an alternative way from these challenges. If you are a procrastinator, set deadlines for all your work. Celebrate or gift yourself when you don’t cheat!

Keep tracking

Set up a reminder to track your progress. Celebrate when you achieve every small milestone. Let people know of your achievements and this will boost your energy to perform better.

Give yourself some time

Do not over expect of yourself, be patient and kind enough. Pat your back that you have at least thought of getting the change in you. It is not magic that the change will happen in the next 10 days. If you plan to lose 20 kgs by December 2020, which is 1.6 kgs per month, even if you are not able to shed the same for a month, it’s okay. Similarly, if you smoke a packet every day and you aim to reduce to 10 cigarettes a day and slowly reduce to one to finally get dedicated. You may want to smoke that 11th cigarette, if you feel so don’t blame yourself. Understand why you want to smoke that 11th one?

Restart if unsuccessful

You don’t need to wait for next year to restart your resolution. It can be restarted when you feel like. Don’t turn relapses or temporary failures turn into an excuse. Instead, accept the mistake and recommit to the path.

To know more about Mentriq, click here

All images by, Pixabay

When we have negative thoughts, we want to get over them, but we can’t. It is easier said than done! According to research, we get round about 60,000 – 80,000 thoughts in a day. Since we are living in this digital world and are exposed to Whatsapp, Facebook, Instagram, Youtube we take in a lot amount of data inside our brain. This gives a hike in the thoughts, some positive some negative. And mostly it’s negative! As we hear and watch so many cases of rape, abduction, honor killings, divorce, rage, acid attacks, relationship failures, infidelity, jealousy we tend to have these negative thoughts about us and our relationships.

Can you stop your thoughts coming to your mind? NO! You can’t! Can you manage it? Yes, you can…!

But HOW is the question? We often get questions like how should I stop thinking negatively? How should I get out of this Anxiety – Depression? Here are some tips –

• Check if the thought is helpful.

Not all negative thoughts are baseless. Out of 10 negative thoughts, 2-3 must be beneficial. Try to analyze and ask yourself questions like what positive can be derived out of this situation? What can I learn? If I ever come across the same situation how can I overcome and act?

• Write down the thought in a journal.

Whenever you have negative thoughts, write them down in a pocket diary/book/journal. Write the negative thought and besides that write a positive one even if you are not able to find one reason. For eg: If you have a thought that you would fail in your exam now convert this thought by writing how hard you would study to get desired marks in your exams.

• Seek evidence.

When you have a negative thought, try and check what is the proof of the same? Is it even true? Are you doubting your partner just because you had several breakups earlier in life or your partner actually having an affair?

• What will he/she think?

We are always bothered about what others will think about us… People don’t have time to think as their minds are full of their career, managing their homes, children, pets, businesses, etc. They have their issues, worries, and troubles. When you have these thoughts you tend to get consumed by them and go far away from reality. Try to seek evidence.

• Observe and take responsibility.

One cannot blame any other person for the way you think. Thoughts coming in your mind are truly yours. So one cannot say, because of you I am in pain. No, we are in pain because we are thinking in a certain way. This thought process of your’s needs change and responsibility.

• Delegate some time for negativity.

You may find this funny, however, it may be really difficult initially to stop the negativity. Hence delegate some time in a day like 10 mins or 15 mins for the negative thoughts. Let them come and go and simultaneously follow the above steps to overcome.

• Always try to live in the present.

When we have negative thoughts we tend to dwell in the past or the future or both sometimes. Start making it a habit to spend more of your time in the present moment and you’ll, naturally have less negative thoughts. Being mindful is the key.

• Exercise, breathing exercises, do what you like.

Divert your mind by doing what you like – painting, listening to music, what interests you. Do breathing exercises for instant relaxation. Go to the gym, do yoga-meditation or any form of physical exercise. It releases endorphins and makes you happy. Although this is a temporary fix, one needs to follow the above points.

• Check if you are blowing out/in proportion.

Are you magnifying or minimizing thoughts? Question your thought, why would you take this thought seriously? What is the evidence? Keep a reality check.

• Positive affirmations.

Write positive sentences to the negative thoughts and say it once you wake up and before sleeping at least 10 times.

• Write your negative thoughts and burn them.

A feeling of relaxation passes throughout your body when you write and burn things that you are obsessed with.

• Talk to a Psychologist.

After following the above steps, if you are not able to get over the negative thoughts do not hesitate to seek help. There could be some areas in life that are not known to you or are untouched, which only a trained professional helps you getting out of the same.

To learn more about Mentriq, click here
All images, courtesy: Pixabay